Whats In Theaters: Soft Food & ❤'s of Darkness
GUESS THE QUOTE!
(answer at bottom of the email)
"It's like the deep south pole, if there was one. There isn't though. "
What's In Theaters
Ageism is a real thing in Hollywood - not only in the casting, but in the stories. Just look at this week's new wide release, Just Getting Started.
It's the movie equivalent of nursing home soft food.
Not that there's anything technically wrong with that, just that it's a bummer the residents don't get a rich meal full of flavor and nuance every once and awhile. Lots of interesting stories out there, regardless of years lived, so hopefully that changes with more and more outlets (see Netflix / Amazon - speaking of, see Netflix's The Meyerowitz Stories).
Until then, grab a straw and slurp down that mushy meal.
Still working on that cutoff issue - go here and click to view the most recent edition if it does get snipped.
NOTE: The Shape of Water and Wonder Wheel are expanding this weekend, as is The Disaster Artist, which should be nationwide.
Ok, let's get to...
This Weekend
Just Getting Started
AKA
""What's that Martha?! Who farted?""
PG-13 / 91 mins
WHAT'S THE DEAL
Morgan Freeman and Tommy Lee Jones milk the old right out of this one with a comedy about two fogeys fighting for position in a "senior folks" community.
TWIST ALERT!
But wait, these fast foes must become quick friends because Freeman is *GASP* in witness protection and the goons are after him, and only Jones (ex-military) has the skillZ to help! Rene Russo stars as well.
Imagine there'll be lots of low hanging fruit jokes about, well, low hanging fruit.
REVIEWS None yet - meaning the studio is holding it from critics cuz they know it's going to get bad reviews. Cheeky.
But come on, this was never going to be a critical darling so if you want it, go get it tiger. Rarrrrr.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Only if WE need to go into the witness protection program. Then again, we do like fake mustaches...
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I, Tonya
AKA
"discarded alternate name for Siri #273"
R / 1 hr 59 mins
WHAT'S THE DEAL
Ah, 1994, such simpler times. When the world's attention was consumed by one Olympic skater's knee being bashed in by hoodlums from another Olympic skater's posse. If only that's all we had to worry about these days...
*shakes head*
Uh, sorry. So I, Tonya is a biopic of sorts where Margot Robbie gets nasty as Tonya Harding and Allison Janney plays her even nastier mother. Tone is black comedy so expect some biting satire about spectacle, media and your (and everyone else's) consumption of it.
NOTE: limited (NY/LA) release. Should expand in subsequent weekends.
REVIEWS
Another movie where reviews highlight the great performances. Expect nomination discussion for both Robbie and Janney.
However, critics also pointing out the social commentary and how the movie fairly deals with the real harm done.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 89%
(64 reviews) ARE WE GONNA GO?
Our knee-jerk reaction (ooh, eeeh.. was that insensitive?) is we'll want to, but probably not get to it. Then again, crazier things have happened - like oh, we don't know... THE PLOT OF THIS MOVIE.
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LAST WEEKEND'S TOP MOVIES
1) Coco ($26.1 mill)
Pixar X Dia de los Muertos X family
97% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
2) Justice League ($16.6 mill)
Wonder Woman and some other dudes
41% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
3) Wonder ($12.6 mill)
Julia Roberts movie with the feels
84% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
4) Thor: Ragnarok ($9.8 mill)
Funny Thor!
92% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
5) Daddy's Home 2 ($7.5 mill)
Four daddies! Not a golf joke
17% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
6) Murder on the Orient Express ($6.8 mill)
It's MUUUUURRDER
58% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
7) Lady Bird ($4.5 mill)
Growin up is hard, and funny
100% RT - Trailer - Showtimes -Fandango
8) Three Billboards Outside... ($4.5 mill)
Frances McDormand in black comedy
94% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
9) The Star ($4 mill)
Talking animals save Christmas!
51% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
10) A Bad Moms Christmas ($5 mill)
Six moms! Doin bad things! (not like that)
28% RT - Trailer - Showtimes - Fandango
Sneak Peek @ Next Weekend
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
AKA
"money money money moneeey, money!"
WHAT'S THE DEAL
It's Star Wars.
Ferdinand
AKA
"there's another movie opening this weekend?"
WHAT'S THE DEAL
Someone's getting cheekin tryin' a little what the biz likes to call "counter programming," for those that may be a little too young for the above beast.
And speaking of beasts, Ferdinand is an animated flick about a bull named, you guessed it, Frank (kidding). He's supposed to fight, but all he wants to do is looooove. Awwww.
John Cena (former WWE wrestler) lends his voice and may we say, is doing a pretty damn fine job of following The Rock's wrestling to movie star playbook. Well done sir, well done.
New Trailers!
THOROUGHBREDS Mar 9, 2018
This looks fun. Two friends, one who's unfeelingly, and one who's quite sensitive, plot to kill the latter's stepdad because he's awful.
MIDNIGHT SUN - Mar 23, 2018
Another non Nicholas Sparks Nicholas Sparks movie. Young girl can't go out in the sun due to a disease and starts dating hunk who doesn't know. (!!!!)
YOU WERE NEVER REALLY HERE
April 6, 2018
This got a lot of attention at Cannes this year. Joaquin Phoenix plays a vet who helps find missing girls, but things don't go as planned.