Jim Halpert 💼 & Mary Poppins 🌂 Take on Monsters... Quietly.
GUESS THE QUOTE
"The Box.
You opened it.
We came."
You smuggly thought 2018 couldn't get any weirder.
And here comes Jim Halpert in a horror movie.
And it's good?
It's good.
Getting cutoff? Go here and click "the most recent edition."
A QUIET PLACE
AKA
"the dream of every parent of a newborn "
PG-13 / 1 hr 30 mins
Horror-Thriller / Paramount
WHAT'S THE DEAL
This is what people call a "scary movie."
Or as some people refer to them, "nope, nope, nope, nope."
But even if you're in the latter camp and these movies make you pee yourself a little, we encourage you to put on your diaper and consider this one - cuz it looks pretty darn great.
The premise is fun one too. Which is...
... that these "things" (aliens?) are killing humans, but can only find them by noise they make, so most of the movie no one talks - which means any sound (the real scare inducer in horror movies) becomes mucho amplified.
John Krasinski (directed it!) and Emily Blunt (married to Krasinski in real life!) are parents who try and keep their family safe from this terrifying change in their world.
REVIEWS
Keepin' it 100.
Well, almost (there's always that guy).
Really like the originality, Krasinski's direction, smart use of sound, and satisfying ending. Also praising the monsters. Sooo, all of it?
This seems to be one of those movies people will be talking about.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 99%
(69 reviews @ publish)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Yup, cuz we love peeing ourselves.
Metaphorically?
Let's go with metaphorically.
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BLOCKERS
AKA
"the movie that made do people really buttchugg beer? spike in Google searches"
R / 1 hr 42 mins
Comedy / Universal
WHAT'S THE DEAL
This is one of those movies where we get to remember it IS better to be living now vs "the (not really as) good (as you remember) ol days."
See, this is a teen comedy about sex.
Cept this time, it's the girls trying to get laid. Because to the shock and horror of their parents, girls want to control their sexuality too. Take that, patriarchy.
That is to say three girls make a pact cuz they want to lose their virginity on prom night and their parents... don't (well, the kids' virginity, not the parents, cuz the parents already lost theirs, ya know, they are parents... ANYWAY).
Reviews have been noting the feminism implicit in small and big shifts in story and, major key here, how funny it is.
Also noteworthy that it's directed by a woman (writer on 30 Rock and Pitch Perfect movies).
REVIEWS
Pretty great.
As mentioned above, flipping the gender script seems to allow for some freshness and it just seems to be funny.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 90%
(60 Reviews @ publish)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Yass
CHAPPAQUIDDICK
AKA
"way too many letters for one word"
PG-13 / 1 hr 41 mins
Mystery-Drama / Entertainment Studios
WHAT'S THE DEAL
Take on the infamous case of Ted Kennedy (yes, that Kennedy family) driving off a bridge and killing his passenger, Mary Jo Kopechne.
Problem was he never told anyone and fishermen found the car and reported it 10 hours later.
His passenger might have survived (or not) had Mr. Senator told someone.
But we'll never know, because he didn't.
Beyond the mystery itself, it takes on the abuse of power (and cover-up?) that ensued - Kennedy never spent any time in jail.
REVIEWS
Are by and large ok with it.
They center on the performance of Jason Clark, who plays Kennedy, and the complications it brings forth (emotional and political).
Seems like if these kinds of things intrigue you, it should be a decent watch.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 79%
(33 Reviews @ publish)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Probably not, but might go if someone asked.
*ahem*
MIRACLE SEASON
AKA
"what Vikings football fans hope for every year (but never get)"
PG / 1 hr 30 mins
Sports Drama / LD Entertainment
WHAT'S THE DEAL
A sports drama through and through.
Badass volleyball team with a badass coach (Helen Hunt) lose their most badass player.
They almost spiral out of control, but use the memory of their friend and fellow competitor to... win the title?
Of course they win the title, but also, to come together as a team and community.
REVIEWS
None yet!
Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 Reviews @ publish)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Nah, we'll leave this one to the Hallmark Channel fans.
INDIE SPOTLIGHT
LEAN ON PETE
AKA
"what you used to mumble to your friend Pete in college whenever you got too drunk - right before you leaned on... Pete "
R / 2 hrs 1 min
Drama / A24
WHAT'S THE DEAL
For starters, we've seen this one and it's great (also, FYI it's from A24) - notably "slow" compared to most movies, but great.
And while it's better to see than to explain, but suffice it to say, it's a movie that brings the feels.
Without being too esoteric, it's a movie about another human's experience that is likely far different from your own, but lets you see how some people have to experience the (often very harsh) world.
More simply, it's a capture of a boy who goes through a lot, and the horse he tries to save along the way.
NOTE: only LA/NY right now.
REVIEWS
A lot of deep words with this one, but overall, lots of fans.
Again, if you didn't gather, this ain't a mainstream movie, but maybe that's part of why you'll like it.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 89%
(47 Reviews @ publish)
ARE WE GONNA GO?
Seen it!
Yay for early LA screenings.
LAST WEEKEND'S TOP MOVIES
(Weekend / Domestic Total - $ = Millions)
1) Ready Player One ($41.8 / $54 ) NEW*
Spielberg directs VR world nostalgiafest
76% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
2) Tyler Perry's Acrimony ($17.2) NEW
Woman scorning does not end well for man
25% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
3) Black Panther ($11.5 / $651)
A super, hero, movie
97% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
4) I Can Only Imagine ($10.4 / $55)
Faith based / based on pop christian song
67% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
5) Pacific Rim Uprising ($9.4 / $46)
Big Robots v Big Monsters Part 2
46% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
*Opened on Wednesday
6) Sherlock Gnomes ($7 / $23 )
Gnumber two in animated now franchise
19% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
7) Tomb Raider ($5 / $51)
Reboot / origin story / Alicia Vikander
50% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
8) A Wrinkle in Time ($4.8 / $83)
Oprah, Reese, Mindy help teen save world
40% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
9) Love, Simon ($4.8 / $32)
Rom-com where lead happens to be gay
92% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
10) Paul, Apostle of Christ ($3.5 / $11)
Religious flick about, well, Paul
35% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
RAMPAGE
The Rock in his most "a The Rock Movie" to date.
Animals (including The Rock's friend George the gorilla) get hit with a toxin that makes them grow huge and angry. Yes, based on the 80's arcade game.
TRUTH OR DARE
If this movie wasn't pitched as It Follows + Final Destination we'll eat your socks (unless you don't want us too - socks are kinda nice).
A horror movie from Blumhouse, producers behind Get Out, Paranormal, Split - but this looks more towards their one trick pony horror movies (Ouija, Happy Death Day).
ISLE OF DOGS
Wes Anderson's newest flea...er, flick.
20 years in the future in Japan dogs are quarantined on an island. A boy tries to find his dog with some help from others. Stop motion animation. Reviews and friends say it's really great.
NOTE: it's out in theaters right now in LA/NY
INDIE SPOTLIGHT
THE RIDER
Another horse related movie in the spotlight.
Except this time it's about a rodeo cowboy who isn't supposed to ride anymore, but doesn't know what else to do. Set in Sioux Indian reservation.
TERMINAL
May 11, 2018
Full trailer. Yes, this is another trailer and not a mistake. A full trailer that's still super confusing and weird about Margot Robbie and Simon Pegg killing people? /shrug
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HOW TO TALK TO GIRLS AT PARTIES
May 18, 2018
Punks meet aliens and... love? Story by Neil Gaiman, directed by John Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig and the Angry Inch). Elle Fanning is the alien girl. Nicole Kidman gets her David Bowie on too.
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FIRST REFORMED
May 18, 2018
The description won't do justice so take the really good early reviews and the fact it stars Ethan Hawke (as a priest) and is directed by screenwriter of Taxi Driver as reason to watch.
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UPGRADE
June 1, 2018
Cheeky B movie that (luckily) knows it's a B movie - kinda sci-fi John Wick. Guy and wife get attacked, wife dies, guy gets paralyzed, until he gets, what else, an upgrade that makes him bionic and essentially superhuman.
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NIGHT SCHOOL
Sept 28, 2018
Kevin Hart and Tiffany Haddish. Hart's the student, Haddish the teacher. Director of Girls Trip.
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