🍒🔨😫 & Relationship Problems Worse Than Yours
GUESS THE QUOTE
"Black as midnight, black as pitch,
blacker than the foulest witch."
Not a ton of exciting this week, by pay special attention to Hereditary, hittin next week.
That one looks like something special.
Getting cutoff? Go here and click "the most recent edition."
ACTION POINT
AKA
"TBD"
R / 1 hrs 25 mins
Comedy / Paramount
WHAT'S THE DEAL
Remember when people thought Jackass influencing kids to punch each other in the junk was the biggest problem we had in the world? Oh happy times.
Those days are over, but Johnny Knoxville is still here doin his thing which is still basically Jackass, but like, with a story.
You'll see Knoxville get hurt, a lot, you'll see nut shots, a lot, and you'll hear "inspired by a true story" in the marketing, a lot.
Based on this bonkers theme bonk in Jersey back in the day. Not shocking, it no longer exists.
REVIEWS
Jackass always got some love even though it was often accused of being the downfall of society. This one though? Eeehh... not so sure
Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)
OUR TAKE
We'd prefer Jackass 4.
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ADRIFT
AKA
"TBD"
PG-13 / 2 hrs
Drama-Romance / STX
WHAT'S THE DEAL
What're the biggest battles in your relationship? Who washes (or doesn't wash) the dishes, whether Coldplay is still a relevant band, or who cheated on what Netflix shows?
That's cute and all, but meet this newly in love couple who have to deal with 80 foot waves, sharks, broken bones, interminable hunger and getting stranded in fuckedville (aka the middle of the ocean).
Shailene Woodley (Divergent) plays the one half of said couple who has to save her boat, her man, and herself.
And like all good(?) movies, it's based on a true story.
REVIEWS
None yet, and really don't know which direction they'll go, but lack of 'em is usually a bad sign.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)
OUR TAKE
Could either be really gripping, or just really annoying.
But either way, it'll certainly make us (even) more terrified of sailing around the world.
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UPGRADE
AKA
"TBD"
R/ 1 hr 35 mins
Sci-Fi-Action-Horror / Blumhouse
WHAT'S THE DEAL
B-movie action flick that's kinda like a combo of Her and The Matrix which may punch (slightly) above its grade. Expect lots of killing, stylish future lighting and crazy camera angles.
Looks like it could maaaybe follow in the path of John Wick, that Keanu Reeves action flick which kind of came out of nowhere and became a cult franchise.
REVIEWS
It's for a certain audience, but people saying it's a lot of "fun" and has a lot of "energy."
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 86%
(22 reviews @ publish)
OUR TAKE
Looks well done and we appreciate a good B-movie, plus this has decent people behind it (creator of Saw/Insidious franchise and produced by Blumhouse - Get Out, Split etc.).
And even though it doesn't look all that original, it's still not a sequel or franchise, so praise for that.
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INDIE SPOTLIGHT
AMERICAN ANIMALS
AKA
"TBD"
R / 2 hrs
Drama-Mystery-Comedy / The Orchard
WHAT'S THE DEAL
You're one of over 7 billion people on earth. You want to stand out. You want purpose. What do you do?
You steal some shit of course. Well, at least that what the kids in this adventure settled on.
So now we get a little flick based on this (true) story where a group of yutes tried a crazy art heist to remove that black spot inside their souls. But instead, ended up hurting themselves and others due to expectations of how their stories should turn out.
REVIEWS
Praising the way it balances a good heist flick with commentary on masculinity, media and expectations.
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 85%
(28 Reviews @ publish)
OUR TAKE
Looks like a good social critique on maleness and the notions of success. Both of which really deserve to have some piss taken out of them.
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ALREADY IN THEATERS + BOX OFFICE
(4-Day Weekend / Domestic Total - $ = Millions)
1) Solo ($103) NEW
Han who shot first gets an origin story
71% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
2) Deadpool 2 ($53.8 / $219)
Green Lantern in a red suit w/ foul mouth
83% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
3) Avengers: Infinity War ($22.5 / $628)
Avengers assemble! ...a vault, cuz we rich
83% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
4) Book Club ($13.1/ $35)
Ladies who lunch read Fifty Shades
56% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
5) Life of the Party ($6.9 / $41)
Melissa McCarthy goes to college
38% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
6) Breaking In ($5.5 / $37 )
Don't F with mama bears and her cubs
25% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
7) Show Dogs ($4.3 / $12)
Talking dogs
16% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
8) Overboard ($4.1 / $43)
Remake of the 80's... classic?
28% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
9) A Quiet Place ($3.1 / $181)
Noises bring scary monsters
95% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
10) RBG ($1.7 / $6)
Doc on the notorious supreme court judge
94% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
OCEAN'S 8
Sandra Bullock puts a crew together (guess how many?) to steal some diamonds. And yes, she plays sister to George Clooney's character, who isn't in it (or IS he?).
HEREDITARY
A horror movie that looks too crazy to explain, starring Tony Collette. A bunch of incredibly positive reviews already. We'll leave this quote here... "Hereditary is one of the most unsettling movies I've ever seen, and I couldn't sleep because of it."
HOTEL ARTEMIS
A secret hospital for criminals where The Nurse, played by Jodie Foster, fixes up damaged goods (read: people). Eerily similar to the hotel from the John Wick movies (double reference points!)
INDIE SPOTLIGHT
WON'T YOU BE
MY NEIGHBOR?
A doc on Mr. Rogers that will probably make you cry, but in a happy way. From Focus Features.
CHRISTOPHER ROBIN
August 3, 2018
Full trailer. Christopher Robin is all growed up, and needs help from his old friend Pooh. Tears likely.
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A SIMPLE FAVOR
September 14, 2018
Second trailer. Anna Kendrick is friends with Blake Lively who is Emily, and apparently quite mysterious, but also... missing. Kinda looks like a Gone Girl type movie.
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THE SISTERS BROTHERS
October 12, 2018
Dark comedy where Joaquin Phoenix and John C. Reilly are (kinda goofy) brothers hired to kill a prospector, Jake Gyllenhaal.
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A-X-L
August 24, 2018
Think cheapish knock-off of 80's kids movies about a boy and a robot (dog) who become friends, but modern day.
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CITY OF LIES
September 7, 2018
On the unsolved Notorious B.I.G. murder. Implies LAPD covered it up cuz they were involved - Johnny Depp and Forest Whitaker.
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MOGWLI
October 19, 2018
Yes, that Mowgli, but no, not that The Jungle Book. This is Warner Brothers attempt at a darker version. Directed by Andy Serkis (Gollum, Caesar from Apes movies).
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