Will you do the fandango? No, not that one. Like from the... ugh, nevermind.

Oct 31, 2018

GUESS THE QUOTE

"I'd have to saaay, a-sphincter says what?
What...?
A-sphincter says what?
What...?
Exactly."

It's Halloween, you want some scary movies. You could go see, well, Halloween, but if you want some home options, we got you.

Really liked Hereditary and A Quiet Place from earlier this year. But other relatively recent favorites are It Follows and The Witch. Also heard Lights Out and Don't Breathe were great. If you're lookin old school, we watched Child's Play (as in Chucky) the other night and it's definitely 80's, but it's still decently clever.

Gettin cutoff? Go here, click "most recent edition."

BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY AKA
"a critical form of weekend entertainment for any kids driving around in the 90s #thanksWaynes #thanksGarth"

PG-13 / 2 hrs 14 mins

Drama-Biopic / Fox

WHAT'S THE DEAL

It's Queen. Well, technically it's a biopic of Queen. Ok, even more than that it's an authorized telling of their story by the surviving members of Queen.

But really, it's all about Freddie.

And who better to play one of the most bombastic performers with one of the biggest voices ever than... that paranoid quiet dude from Mr. Robot? Huh. Turns out they call it acting for a reason, because Rami Malek doesn't look too shabby as the full toothed singer. Seeing as the band gave the ol stomp stomp clap to this one (Rami had to sing in front of Queen members to get the gig even), it'll have all the songs, the concerts - including the epic LIVE AID show - and one would hope a decent level of authenticity, but you can bet in the end they'll all come out lookin' pretty darn good.

But of course Mr. Mercury will come out lookin' the best, because damn right he would.

Insider Dish: the director, Bryan Singer (X-Men, Usual Suspects), was fired after not showing up for work after shooting 2/3 of the movie. Real reasons he didn't show up are still unclear, although he says to "help family."

REVIEWS

Split. People loving Malek as Mercury, but a decent chunk saying it's a bit rote overall - which doesn't mean it's terrible, but don't expect a ton of complexity.

Rotten Tomatoes Score: 57%
(114 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: Queen fans, duh. People curious to learn more about one of the best selling bands of all time.

(Not): For people who hate Queen, duh. Or get bored by straightforward biopics

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THE NUTCRACKER
AND THE FOUR REALMS

AKA
"Alice in Wonderland 3"

PG / 1 hr 39 mins
Family-Fantasy-Adventure / Disney

WHAT'S THE DEAL

Bet you a hundred bucks the amount of glitter used in this movie could cover Delaware thrice over. Not that's not a bad thing, just ya know, that it's a shitload of glitter. We also bring it up because those tiny flecks of environmental disasters are also a pretty damn good metaphor for this movie; they're bright and shiny, kids are usually the most hyped about them, and while they're a fun novelty, they have a tendency to wear out their welcome quickly - especially when you realize that once you've put them on, they're stickier than a high person's fingers after they get into the peanut butter.

While we can't exactly speak to the how quickly you'll want to show this one the door, as reviews are still in TBD status, we have a feeling this one won't satiate much beyond a sugar high. But that may be enough! If you're curious what actually happens, we can sum it up as a combo of The Lion Witch & the Wardrobe meets Alice in Wonderland - with a lil bit of ballet thrown in for posterity. I.e. kid thrown into fantasy world with weird/jarring characters, kid must save fantasy world.

Note: you will get some legit ballet if you go, as Misty Copeland (principal dancer of American Ballet Theatre - one of one the big ones) gets to do her thing at a few points.

REVIEWS

If it had stellar reviews, you'd be reading them right now.

Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT)FOR?

For: the kiddies and glitter fanatics

(Not): for people who want Christmas to back the fuck off for at least another month

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NOBODY'S FOOL

AKA
"but somebody gonna act like one"

R / 1 hr 50 mins
Comedy / Paramount

WHAT'S THE DEAL

It's that Tiffany Haddish show.

Who? You know, she was in Night School with Kevin Hart like literally a month ago (the teacher) - jeez, don't you read this email? OoOOoh. Eggs-actly.

Cept this time she doesn't have to share it with anyone. Well, she does, but they'll all be playin the straight wo(man) and reacting to all her Haddishness goin on. Which, if you know you're into that "ness," you'll wanna give this one a perusal. The story, conjured up by Tyler Perry (directs too), has the newly released from jail (for? dunno) Haddish investigating her richer, and definitely more conservative sister's online boyfriend. Why? Cuz he may be catfishing her. But plot schmot, it's all about lettin the star do her thing.

Note: this is Haddish's fourth role in a theatrical release this year (read: that's a lot). Whoopi Goldberg plays the sisters' mom.

REVIEWS

Good luck with em. Tyler Perry doesn't get much love from critics. Better off watching the trailer and deciding on your own.

Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT)FOR?

For: Tyler Perry fans & Tiffany Haddish fans. Together or apart.

(Not): for people still thinkin, "Tiffany Haddish who?"

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LIMITED RELEASE SPOTLIGHT
BOY ERASED

AKA
"going through heaven to get to hell"

R / 1 hr 51 mins
Drama / Focus Features

WHAT'S THE DEAL

Good chance you may hear about this one through interviews and the like because of the larger subject matter it deals with - gay "conversion therapy." A big aspect of the story, which is based on a memoir of a 19 year old outted to his mother (Nicole Kidman) and preacher father (Russell Crowe) who do not take it well - at. all.

Lucas Hedges (Manchester by the Sea) plays the son who goes to the "therapy," while dealing with his identity, including his strictly religious upbringing as well as his relationship with his parents. Has a more subtle tone than sweeping - expect a lot of personal struggle and development.

Note: it's the second movie this year to deal with "conversion therapy." The first was the well reviewed The Miseducation of Cameron Post.

REVIEWS

Well liked. Reviews enjoying the acting and complexity of how it deals with the characters, although some wanted a more fiery POV (as in they thought it too bland to be effective).

Rotten Tomatoes Score: 82%
(51 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: those who like character more than plot

(Not): those who think conversion therapy is still legit

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ALREADY IN THEATERS + BOX OFFICE
(3-Day Weekend / Domestic Total - $ = Millions)

1) Halloween ($31 / $126)
Nee noo noo nee noo noo nee
79% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

2) A Star is Born ($14 / $149)
Bradley Cooper/Lady Gaga love story
90% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

3) Venom ($10.7 / $187)
Spider-Man nemesis movie, w/ no Spidey
30% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

4) Goosebumps 2: Haunted... ($7.3 / $38)
Kids light horror flick based on books
47% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

5) Hunter Killer ($6.7) NEW
Gerard Butler sub movie
34% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

6) The Hate U Give ($5.1 / $18)
Girl deals w/ split lives & death of friend
97% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

7) First Man ($4.9 / $38)
Ryan Gosling as Neil Armstrong -> moon
88% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

8) Smallfoot ($4.8 / $73)
Bigfoot(feet?) searches for us tiny footers
75% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

9) Night School ($3.2 / $71)
Kevin Hart schooled by Tiffany Haddish
28% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

10) mid90s ($3 / $3.3)
Jonah Hill directed / skateboard kids
77% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

THE GRINCH

As done by Illumination, the brains behind Despicable Me, Minions and The Secret Life of Pets. Benedict Cumberbatch voices the greeny meany.

The Trailer

THE GIRL IN THE SPIDER'S WEB

It's another Dragon Tattoo story, but not a direct sequel, but kinda? It's confusing. We'll explain more next week. Early reviews are split, but more pos than neg.

The Trailer

OVERLORD

WW2 action-horror flick produced by JJ Abrams where some American soldiers find "them Nazi's" doin some crazy zombie makin ish. Reviews are pretty tasty.

The Trailer

LIMITED RELEASE SPOTLIGHT
THE FRONT RUNNER

Hugh Jackman as Gary Hart, who was close to winning the 1988 Democratic Pres nomination before he got caught in an affair. Directed by Jason Reitman (Juno, Up in the Air, Tully) Note: this comes out on Tuesday of next week.

The Trailer

VOX LUX
December 7, 2018

Natalie Portman plays a pop star (who came to prominence after surviving a school shooting at 13) that is trying a comeback when more crazy shit happens. Expect Oscar talk for Portman. Jude Law in it too.

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COLD PURSUIT
February 8, 2019

Liam Neeson is a snow plow driver, who, um, is really good at killing? Good thing, cuz he kills a lot as he gets revenge after his son is murdered(?) by drug gangsters. Looks just self aware enough to be fun. Laura Dern and Emily Rossum get to play too.

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ISN'T IT ROMANTIC
February 14, 2019

Rebel Wilson gets caught in a romantic comedy. And it's pretty hilarious.

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HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON:
THE HIDDEN WORLD
February 22, 2019

Second trailer. Third (and last?) film in the Dreamworks franchise. More dragons, more bad guys, same heart?

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TYLER PERRY'S
A MADEA FAMILY FUNERAL
March 1, 2019

Someone dies and Madea handles the funeral, and all the craziness that that entails, ensues. Perry has said this will be the last Madea film.

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What's In Theaters +

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