Is it weird that "dying teens" is a legit movie genre?

Mar 13, 2019

GUESS THE QUOTE
"Dented cans are half price;
Microsoft went down 3 points,
we gotta save some money."

Heads up we added Captive State to the nationwide releases (i.e. 2000+ theaters) this weekend. The studio had been planning on a limited release, hence why you didn't see it in Sneak Peek @ Next Weekend last week, buuuut they apparently upped the count.

Also, did you watch Captain Marvel? What'd ya think? We caught it on Sunday night and was fairly pleased overall. Have some more nuanced thoughts, but easier via 1/1.

Gettin cutoff? Go here, click "most recent edition."

FIVE FEET APART

AKA
"the minimum distance you'd like to be from that odorous guy on the subway, instead of the 0.5 inches you are currently"

PG-13 / 2 hrs

Romance-Drama / CBS Films

WHAT'S THE DEAL

Picture your most favoritest snack. Imagine it's in front of you, taunting you with its awesomeness. You want to eat the snack, and the snack wants to be eaten by you. But you can't. Cuz if you touch that snack, you'll DIE.

That's basically this movie, except, ya know, with humans (editor's note: uh... were people just analogized to snacks?) (additional editor's note: we don't actually have editors. and yes, they were).

Now, to be fair, the situation at hand in this cinematic experience is actually quite serious. Two teens have cystic fibrosis which affects their lungs and means infections can be deadly - hence the distance metric. So while these burgeoning humans should be having fun, they're mostly miserable keeping themselves alive downing pills, being poked, prodded, all while suckin oxygen. Until... *

If all this makes your mind wander to The Fault in Our Stars, give it a cookie, cuz that's the right tone here (although in a switcheroo, the book was actually based on the screenplay. Cheeky).

NOTE: stars Cole Sprouse (Jughead and from Riverdale and The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, duh! ) as well as Haley Lu Richardson (Split and Edge of Seventeen).

*they meet, duh

REVIEWS

None yet. While we're quite confident it's not going to world = 🔥, it seems like it could be a fine enough version of what it is.

Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: forlorn teens, or really just teens, and the adults who still pine to be them

(Not): for people who've shorted stock of tissue making companies

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WONDER PARK

AKA
"the place you go to ponder why this couldn't have been a better movie"

PG / 1 hr 26 mins

Animated-Family-Comedy / Paramount Animation

WHAT'S THE DEAL

This one's straight for "the kiddies." Sure, there's a plot per se - young girl girl has to use power of imagination to revitalize magical theme park - but the focus here looks to be more hyperkinetic activity and numerous quirky animal sidekicks who rip off jokes like, a beaver who says "what the chuck?" (get it, chucking wood...), throughout.

It's the first real effort from the struggling Paramount Pictures, who created an animation division years ago and this is their oft reworked debut. It does feature quite a few notable names (e.g. Matthew Broderick, Kenan Thompson, John Oliver, Mila Kunis) for voicework, so that's something.

REVIEWS

None yet. Suspect it'll get a few "decent enough diversion to entertain the very little ones," but that's mostly because our standards for tiny kids fair is hella low (counterpoint: this is the most popular kids entertainment currently)

Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: tiny hoomans who can't wipe their own wittle noses, aaaand their nose wiper slaves (read: parents)

(Not): for animation fans whose bar has been set by Pixar

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CAPTIVE STATE

AKA
"accurate description of the way your body feels when you've eaten four protein bars and nothing else"

PG-13 / 1 hr 49 mins

Sci-Fi-Drama-Suspense / Focus

WHAT'S THE DEAL

Honestly, this one's a bit of a mystery, both good and bad. Good: studio has been coy in the trailers so as to not give too much away and focusing on atmosphere and tone Bad: the release strategy & date has shifted, marketing seems light and there aren't reviews yet - i.e. is there not much to give away?

But even with the somewhat clandestine previews we know the story is akin to District 9, but instead of the aliens becoming the captives, we do.

It also looks to use its sci-fi setting to take on larger themes (again, a la District 9), focusing on the conflict between the humans who capitulate to their captors and those who rise up against both their human enemies and their extraterrestrial overlords. Which is were the main character, Ashton Sanders (Moonlight) gets pulled between the sides. John Goodman also jumps in, but again, we're unsure how primary of a player he is and if he's ultimately a bad/good guy.

Finally, it's directed by Rupert Wyatt, which also has it's good/bad - he directed the pretty solid Rise of the Planet of the Apes, but his last movie was the very underwhelming remake of The Gambler in 2014.

REVIEWS

As noted, tbd.

Rotten Tomatoes Score: TBD
(0 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: Seems like a lock for those sci-fi fans who'll take anything in the genre

(Not): For those who think "alien" means anything that isn't on CBS from 8-11 PM weekdays

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LIMITED RELEASE SPOTLIGHT
THE MUSTANG

AKA
"a given when creating a list of the top ten self adorned nicknames"

R / 1 hr 36 mins

Drama / Focus

WHAT'S THE DEAL

If you read our short overview last week, there's not a tooon more to say really. This is a movie where character > plot. Which is a part of its appeal of course, mostly because it seems to do it right (see below).

But there does seem to be something about human and horse movies that when done well, really work. Maybe it's because we want to believe a convicted felon (Matthias Schoenaerts - Rust and Bone, Red Sparrow), struggling with his identity, dealing with the pain of abandoning his young daughter, can learn to change through the power of working with horses. Ooor maybe because horses are just really fucking cool/scary/amazing creatures. *shrug*

NOTE: produced by Robert Redford and also stars Thomas Mitchell (Straight Outta Compton, Mudbound) and Bruce Dern (Nebraska)

REVIEWS

"The Mustang" has an arc you can trace, but you will not, I promise you, predict the final shot, and it's a beauty - a tearjerker as delicate as they come." Owen Gleiberman, Variety

Rotten Tomatoes Score: 96%
(25 reviews @ publish)

WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?

For: those who enjoy a slow, but satisfying, build

(Not): for those who think "character study" is another way to say "boring"

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ALREADY IN THEATERS + BOX OFFICE
(3-Day Weekend / Domestic Total - $ = millions)

1) Captain Marvel ($153.4) NEW
Lucky 21?
79% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

2) How To Train Your Dr... ($14.7 / $120)
Culmination (maybe) of the well liked series
91% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

3) Tyler Perry's A Madea... ($12.5 / $ 46)
Madea makes one last(?) appearance
13% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

4) The Lego Movie 2: The S... ($3.9 / $97)
Pretty self explanatory
86% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

5) Alita: Battle Angel ($3.2 / $78)
Future set sci-fi, cyborg girl turns weapon
60% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

6) Green Book ($2.5 / $80)
Two men (one black/white), unlikely friends
79% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

7) Isn't It Romantic ($2.3 / $44)
Rebel Wilson hits head, lands in a rom-com
70% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

8) Greta ($2.2 / $8)
Hell in a handbag
54% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

9) Fighting With My Family ($2.2 / $19)
Wrestling comedy / produced by The Rock
92% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

10) Apollo 11 ($1.3 / $4)
Moon landing doc / "rediscovered" footage
100% RT -  Trailer - Showtimes

Jordan Peele's follow up to Get Out. You need more? Fine, it's at 100% on RT.

The Trailer

LIMITED RELEASE SPOTLIGHT
HOTEL MUMBAI

A fictional retelling of the 2008 terrorist attacks in Mumbai, focusing on the Taj Hotel where people were trapped inside with the attackers. Think the film United 93, although maybe a bit more "movie movie." Early reviews are good, although there will always be a debate about honoring vs exploiting.

The Trailer

LONG SHOT
May 3, 2019

Second trailer (again, only 3 weeks after the first). Seth Rogen starts "a thing" (yup, as in the dating kind - hence the title) with his former babysitter, Charlize Theron, who is now Secretary of State and running for President. Lots of "crowd pleaser" comments in the good early reviews.

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BOOKSMART
May 24, 2019

Pay attention to this one. It premiered at SXSW last week and is getting bonkers good reviews (not unlike Bridesmaids did...). First movie directed by Olivia Wilde; two friends who focused on school realize as they graduate they shoulda had (a lot) more fun. So they do.

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ALADDIN
May 24, 2019

Full trailer. Little guy Abu makes an appearance, finally. Plus, we get a more concerted look at Will Smith as Genie - doesn't look as bad, but you'll still have to get over him not being Robin Williams. :/

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LATE NIGHT
June 7, 2019

Written by and starring Mindy Kaling - she joins as the first woman (+ of color) on the all male writing staff of a late night show hosted by Emma Thompson. Premiered at Sundance earlier this year and Amazon paid a lot for it. Reviews are quite solid.

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THE ART OF SELF DEFENSE
June 21, 2019

Teaser. Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network, Zombieland) signs up for karate after an assault. Looks subversive and quirky.

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GOOD BOYS
August 16, 2019

Think middle school Superbad. Mainly cuz it's produced by Seth Rogen. Also premiered at SXSW, but reviews are more mixed.

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What's In Theaters +

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