GUESS THE QUOTE
"Shame on me for kissing you
with my eyes closed so tight."
Two good choices this weekend. Only one nationwide mind you, but still.
And continuing the trend of highlighting movies that look good but won't be getting wide distribution, check out the trailers for: Swallow (a psychological mind fuck where a stereotypical housewife starts to literally swallow household objects) and Straight Up (fast talking rom-com where a "he thought so" gay male starts dating a straight woman).
Cutoff? Go here, click "most recent edition."
BIRDS OF PREY
AKA
"pigeons.
cuz have you seen those things
attack breadcrumbs?!"
R / 1 hr 49 mins
Action-Comedy / Warner Bros
WHAT'S THE DEAL
In One Line: Margot Robbie gets a solo (but not) adventure as the powder faced manic anti-hero Harley Quinn.
Do you ever want to just say fuck it? Trick everyone who's wronged you to sit bare-assed in a puddle of super glue and then have yourself a night by blowing some shit up? It sounds pretty fun. Somewhat criminal (read: very criminal, please do not do). But fun. That's what Birds of Prey looks like - mostly illegal stuff, but done in an amusing (stylish) way.
Which is welcome since Birds of Prey is a spin-off of Suicide Squad, which, was generally considered a mishap of a movie; good marketing maybe, but disappointing cinema. That doesn't mean everything in it was bad. Like Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn, the star of Prey. Her take on the character first appearing in Batman: The Animated Series (and inspired by a scene from the soap opera Days of Our Lives?!) was considered by plenty to be the best part of the movie.
So what does she do after departing her crew of misfits? Hook up with another one, natch. But this time it's a roster that happens to be full of women, who band together to protect a young girl from some some creep named Black Mask (Ewan McGregor). But the plot is the least of what you should be showing up for. It's the attitude and ethos that'll probably bring you the most joy. It looks akin to Deadpool but with a slightly darker, and yet at the same brighter, hue that has more glitter, less fourth wall breaking and probably about the same amount of cocaine? But only take that as a guidepost as Prey looks distinct enough to have its own identity.
Note: if you're wondering where this fits in with all the other DC movies, don't, just... don't. Because at this point, not even Warner Bros. knows. There's the Justice League thing (except the only ones still active are Wonder Woman and Aquaman), and then there's the Joaquin Phoenix Joker thing, and now there's a new Batman starring Robert Pattinson thing. So yeah, it's convoluted AF. Oh, and there's going to be a sequel / reboot of Suicide Squad called The Suicide Squad (also starring Robbie).
REVIEWS
Robbie again getting tons of praise, but so is the film overall, with the focus on the style and attitude.
"In a world gone mad, the catharsis of Prey's twisted sisterhood doesn't just read as pandemonium for its own sake; it's actually pretty damn sweet." Leah Greenblatt, EW
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 89%
(73 reviews @ publish)
WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?
For: you like comic book movies, but have gotten a bit bored with all the same same they're offering / wouldn't mind seein a few women break some men's shins
(Not): you think swearing is just so fucking vulgar
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THE LODGE
AKA
"probably what they should've
called Gretel & Hansel"
R / 1 hr 48 mins
Horror / NEON
WHAT'S THE DEAL
In One Line: Think atmospheric horror movie in the vein of "Hereditary" and "Midsommar" that's focused more on being unsettling than a typical horror movie trading in jump scares.
This is the second movie in as many weeks that sticks an adult woman with two kids in a cabin soaked with dread where the children fear for their lives.
But The Lodge is no fairy tale.
While it may have lessons to impart, like, uh, don't leave your kids alone in a blizzard for days with your fiancée before they've learned to accept her in their lives, Dad! The teachings will take a backseat to a building feeling of "what is under my skin and why is it moving?" But don't worry, there won't actually be anything under your fleshy top layer, it's just the sense that everything is going to go to hell. Which, of course it will, because this is a horror movie. But not in a typical boo! gotcha! kinda way. More in the your hand gripping your seat neighbor's wrist tighter and tighter until they have to gently remind you they're human, and they feel pain. But back to that hell thing I mentioned, because it's kind of the driver of everything here. The adult woman / fiancée, played by Riley Keough (The Girlfriend Experience, Logan Lucky, Elvis' granddaughter?! Yup.) has a very intimate relationship with that balmy eternal torture fest - both literal and metaphorical. Because Keough is the only surviving member of a religious cult where everyone else committed suicide. And once the two kids find this out, well, their already heightened sense of apprehension jumps in an elevator and starts flailing about trying to push the button for the roof.
But you probably shouldn't learn much more as this seems like the type of movie where the less you know the better (note: with that in mind do not watch the second trailer if you're already interested). Focus more on the good reviews and the likelihood of you feeling like you'll need to take a shower after viewing.
REVIEWS
Unsettling, haunting. Lots of reviewers using these words to describe it- in a good way. Keough getting pretty much universal praise.
"A film that manages to burrow its way under your skin and stay there right through to the horrifying end." - Benjamin Lee, The Guardian
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 81%
(63 reviews @ publish)
WHO'S IT (NOT) FOR?
For: You watched and came out of movies like Hereditary and Midsommar all like "hell yeah, gimme more"
(Not): watch a movie like Midsommar? Are you freakin nuts?
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ALREADY IN THEATERS + BOX OFFICE
(3-Day Weekend /
Domestic Total - $ = millions)
1) Bad Boys for Life ($17.7 / $148)
Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, they back
78% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
2) 1917 ($9.5 / $119)
WW I one shot
89% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
3) Dolittle ($7.6 / $55)
Robert Downey Jr. can talk to animals
16% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
4) Gretel & Hansel ($6.2) NEW
Moody retelling of classic fairy tale
58% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
5) Jumanji: The Next... ($6 / $291)
Further in video game hijinks
71% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
6) The Gentlemen ($5.6 / $20)
Guy Ritchie back with gang caper stuff
72% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
7) Star Wars: The Rise of... ($3.2 / $507)
The end to the Skywalker story
52% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
8) Little Women ($3.1 / $99)
Greta Gerwig takes on the classic book
95% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
9) The Turning ($3 / $12)
Horror flick based on classic story
15% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
10) The Rhythm Section ($2.7) NEW
Blake Lively action revenge... fun?
30% RT - Trailer - Showtimes
THE PHOTOGRAPH
Kinda The Notebook"ish" in how it tells two love stories. 'Cept here it's two different sets of couples. The main being Issa Rae (Insecure) and Lakeith Stanfield (who is in basically everything at this point).
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG
Finally making it to theaters after an entire revamp of the character design. Good on Paramount for listening to feedback (they kinda had to though...).
FANTASY ISLAND
A more direct horror version of the 70's / 80's TV show where visitors have their fantasies come true. But maybe not as they intended.
ORDINARY LOVE
A long married couple (Liam Neeson, Lesley Manville) who are still very much in love deal with a cancer diagnosis. Reviews have been quite good.
DOWNHILL
American redo of very well liked black comedy Force Majeure. Which sees a husband run to save himself during what he / wife / kids think is an avalanche. It... doesn't go over well. And neither does this remake with critics so far. 😬
THE WAY BACK
March 6, 2020
Second trailer. Ben Affleck plays a guy dealing with alcoholism while coming back to coach his high school basketball team. From director of better than expected Warrior and The Accountant.
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR
MULAN
March 27, 2020
Final trailer. Continues to show the action vs any comedy or singing (of which there is none, I do believe).
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR
SPIRAL
May 15, 2020
Teaser. Chris Rock and Samuel L. Jackson in a "re-imagining" "rebooting" or "re" something of Saw. Plot is unknown except someone is killing cops, and that Rock is one. If you're confused, Rock produced the movie and really want to make it.
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR
FAST AND FURIOUS 9
May 22, 2020
Dom has an evil brother (John Cena?!?!), Han from Tokyo Drift and Fast 6 is back somehow (apparently he died? Idk, these movies aren't my bag) yada yada yada, you know you're just gonna watch for them 'splosions and car chases.
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR
MINIONS:
THE RISE OF GRU
July 3, 2020
A 12 year old Gru tries to get into the evil people's club. It doesn't go so well.
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR
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