All in All is All We Are
"I can't put my arms down!
*whimper*"
PINNED: this newsletter started as a way to highlight movies coming to theaters (see: the name). Then, "the bullshit" happened. And I started featuring movies in theaters, VOD or streaming (see: the +). Point is, if there's a movie worth checking out, you'll probably find it here.
Thanksgiving has tendency to trend towards abundance, in all respects. Abundant food, abundant family, abundant football, abundant family, abundant dogs, abundant family, abundant movies, abundant family. If you're needing a respite from.... any one of the above abundances, take a look at the long list of movie options this week, and maybe treat yourself, and your, family, to a couple hours of escape.
And when I say a long list of movies, I mean what I said. Otherwise why would I say it? And it's going to be even longer because I forgot two movies that Netflix released in that past couple weeks that should've gotten a shout-out - Passing and Tick, Tick... Boom! It's in part because of their limited theatrical release patterns, which can screw me up; which is just like horribly insensitive of The Flix not to consider my process. But regardless, I still should've featured them. My b.
But with so many options this week, I'm not going to go into heavy detail and instead just do it based on what you want, cuz isn't it all about you anyway? Woah, that came across as like a super strong insult. Go back, read it again, but like, imagine it was a yoga teacher saying it. Cool? Coooooool.
PS speaking of family. If you have any that like movies, do me a solid and mention this newsletter eh? Eh.
Extra Credit Movie(s): Halle Berry directed a movie (Bruised), her first. She also stars in it. Congrats Halle! (disclosure: Halle Berry does not read this newsletter). It's a classic Rocky like sports story where she down, but she ain't out. Did I say too much? No I did not, cuz reviews say you'll get exactly what you expect to get, including lots of cliches. But reviews aren't all bad, so if this is your genre, it might be worth a play button tap.
What do you want?
I want...
...nay, need, a new Disney movie, cuz I love Moana but maybe a bit less so after the 73rd time. Oh, and get me out of the god damn house please, these kids are going nuckin futs. ----- Cool, go see ENCANTO in theaters. It's gonna be super family friendly, and remember, you're a part of the family, so you should enjoy it too. Bonus: Lin-Manuel Miranda wrote a bunch of new songs for it (just like he did for... Moana).
Trailer | 🍅: 91% | Theaters
...the exact opposite of a Disney movie. Something kind of kitschy and maybe almost like a soap opera, but with like really famous people. Oh, toss in some murder would you? ----- Got you. Check out HOUSE OF GUCCI. Reviews are just ok, but you'll get that Lady Gaga glamitude. Yes, I just said that.
Trailer | 🍅: 61% | Theaters
...something that takes me back to the days of my youth. Oh, I was born in the 80's, is that too specific? 😬 ---- Come on, would I ever let you down? As if (shit, that was 90's wasn't it?). To help me help you, I got my mans Neil Patrick Harris to tell you a little tale of his epic quest to acquire that which is all holy to a many a young child. A video game system. Specifically a Nintendo Entertainment System - NES if you're nesty (get it?). And the miracle? 8-BIT CHRISTMAS might just be a new holiday classic.
Trailer | 🍅: 75% | HBO Max)
...a bad movie, but like a movie I knew was gonna be bad, so I don't care as much. Might as well just base it on a video game, cuz then at least it has an excuse. ----- It had to be Resident Evil, maybe the most successful video game to movie adaptation franchise ever. But we're going to send you back to the beginning and wipe away that franchise canon. Cuz of course we are. Don't worry, WELCOME TO RACCOON CITY may be less superhero"y" than the Milla Jovovich ones, but critics still hate it.
Trailer | 🍅: 27% | HBO Max)
...the kind of movie that I can watch and actually have some thoughts about the world after. Oh, it'd be cool if it's gonna get some Oscar noms so I can impress my friends. ----- You might want to consider some of your motivations, but PASSING, Rebecca Hall's nuanced directorial debut about race is a good place for your desires, no matter their origins.
Trailer | 🍅: 90% | Netflix
...to sing. Well, maybe just watch other people sing. My grandma gets reeeaall testy if I wake her up during nap time. But can you toss in some emotion? Makes that belting even more meaningful, ya know? ---- Oh I know. Which is why I suggest you check out Lin-Manuel Miranda (him again!) directing his first movie, TICK, TICK... BOOM! Which is a sort-a biopic about the guy who created Rent, but sadly died before he could see it become the success it became. 😕
Trailer | 🍅: 88% | Netflix
Note: all movies are either streaming or in theaters NOW.
(called out from top, left to right)
What do dinosaurs, farcical marriages that seem to magically work out and pets of superheros have in common?
Uh, nothing. Why would you even ask that?
Just messing with you, they're clearly propaganda for the Illuminati. That and they're in this week's trailers.
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