Help me build the future 🚀

Jul 06, 2022

"For guys like me,
Las Vegas washes away your sins.
It’s like a morality car wash."

PINNED: this newsletter started as a way to highlight movies coming to theaters (see: the name). Then, "the bullshit" happened. And I started featuring movies in theaters, VOD or streaming (see: the +). Point is, if there's a movie worth checking out, you'll probably find it here.

I've talked about it before, but the whole blurring of movies and TV is getting like, really blurry. I've been watching the new of Stranger Things with the rest of the world and I keep commenting how each episode is like a movie, both in scope and run-time (budget too). But that's very much by design. Someone recently tweeted out a link to the pitch deck the Duffer Brothers made for Montauk (the og name for the show) and beyond being a really good pitch deck, they also specifically say, "Montauk will be structured like a film. There will be a definitive beginning, middle, and end." While they didn't quite hold to that, their intentions were and are easy to see on the screen. Add the upcoming Lord of the Rings prequel series being produced by Amazon where director J.A. Bayona said "The Rings Of Power is not television," "It's a new form we're creating here." And finally there's one of the og filming maximalists, Kevin Costner, (Dances With Wolves and The Postman were both three hours!) who is making a western which he suspects will be cut into four movies released over three months, but "It will eventually be cut up into [hour-long episodes] or 42 minutes — however TV works. But their first viewing of it will be as four 2 hour and 45-minute movies."

Now, I love "movie like" TV, or really long movies released at home. Whatever you wanna call 'em. But what would be fun is to watch Stranger Things - and whatever else I want - in a theater, with my partner / friends and only with my partner / friends.

So it's made me wonder, is there a budding opportunity for something in between a movie theater and my couch? Because while there a tons of perks to chillin' at home - hit pause whenever you want, food is cheaper, no one else is talking, you can wear pajamas, farting freely, etc. etc. - there are still penty of upsides to going out to the theater - they have a bevy of snacks (some theaters even have legit good food, see: The Alamo), it's fun to get out of the house, they're playing the newest movies, the screen / sound is waaaay bigger / better than your home setup.

I'm imagining something quite a bit smaller than a traditional movie theater, but still bigger than most people's living rooms. Where you could rent out time (a subscription service perhaps?) and watch whatever you want. Sort of an on-demand living room where you can watch the weekend's latest releases, newest season of the hottest show or hell, your favorite episodes of The Office for the billionth time. Kind of like what theaters were doing during the pandemic allowing people to rent out entire theaters for (relatively) cheap, but in a much more concerted way.

I think it might be hard to convince people initially, but the way things are trending with shrinking theatrical windows, the reason you choose the theater is for the experience, not the content. So why not just create a super fun experience and expand the content offering?

If you're looking to invest, get at me and I'll send you my Venmo.

Until then, check out What to Watch This Week, because we have TWO movies with 100% RT scores (for now?).

Extra Credit Movies:

Hello, Goodbye and Everything In Between. Surprisingly, not a Fall Out Boy song title, but a Netflix rom-com where two high schoolers decide to break up before they go to college. I guess you could say they're consciously uncoupling? Some early reviews and they're the definition of "shrug." Streaming on Netflix this Friday.

Both Sides of the Blade. A French movie that is oh so very French. Involves a women who gets herself involved in a spicy love triangle. Claire Denis directs. Reviews are quite affectionate. Playing in LIMITED THEATERS this Friday.

THOR:
LOVE AND THUNDER

The previous Thor movie, Ragnarok, is kind of a special one for me. I mean, I really enjoyed it, but that's not why. It's special because it was the first movie I featured in waaaay back in November of 2017. That's a long time ago. And it made me wonder - will this newsletter still be around when the next Thor comes out? Will there even be a "next Thor?" All things I do not know. What I do know is that the current "next Thor" is here and I'm contractually* obligated to tell you about it (*I make contracts with myself, and what of it?).

While it's been nearly five years, and loads of things have changed in that time, some things apparently haven't. Most pertinent being, Taika Waititi's sense of humor. The director kinda kicked the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) in the booty when he made Ragnarok, bringing a much needed irreverence to the character of Thor as well as the mega-franchise. Outside of maybe The Guardians of the Galaxy movies, it was easily the most "comedy" centric of the Marvel movies. But the thing with kicks in the ass is that while you can get away with one unexpected, you're proooobably not gonna get away with two.

And while the by and large people are liking the movie, there are enough reviewers out there who feel the eccentricity of the past has become the dad joke of the present. To put it another way, some people have tired of the schtick. Now, this is sounds very much like a mileage may vary situation. Personally? Huge Waititi fan, so I imagine my take will be a bit more forgiving.

But while the tone may be roughly the same, the story is of course, not. Well, not exactly. The biggest news is that Jane is back - aka Natalie Portman. Thor's bae in the first two movies returns from a long sojourn and is a bit more swoll than when we last saw her, and wielding Mjölnir  (Thor's hammer that was shattered be Hela in the previous movie). Valkyrie returns too, as does Waititi's Korg. No Hulk though. The Guardians also make an appearance (if you remember, Thor peaced with them after the last Avengers movie). Oh! Almost forgot. There is a bad guy of course. Christian Bale. But of course there's a bad guy.

So I guess you just have to ask yourself, do you want Chris Hemsworth as Thor to slap your ass again? Aaaaand then you have to stop fantasizing about him and decide if you want to see the damn movie.

Vibe: Taika time

Out   Friday
Watch   In Theaters
The Trailer | 1 hr 59 mins | PG-13 | 🍅: 70%

THE SEA BEAST

You've heard all the adages: "looks can be deceiving" / "don't judge a book by its cover" / "things aren't always as they seem." Blah blah blah. And yet, when you see a rambutan, the fruit generally grown in Southeast Asia, you, like most, probably think to yourself, "Ew. I'm never eating that thing, it looks like a damn t...." *rudely inserts himself into your thoughts and cuts you off* Yes. yes it does. But under its somewhat disconcerting exterior, lies a tasty morsel. This same notion of being rewarded for looking deeper seems to apply to the The Sea Beast in myriad ways.

The first is that The Sea Beast is a Netflix animated release, so you might assume it's another one of their fairly bland offerings (they haven't quite nailed the category like Dreamworks or Disney / Pixar have). And while the number of reviews are still fairly limited (in the twenties), every single one of them is positive. Like really positive. A few niggles here and there, but overall, critics seem almost... delighted? As if this is an unexpected turn. But the turn should've been expected, since the movie is helmed by Chris Williams. You don't know his name, but you know his movies, namely: Big Hero 6 and the put-it-on-repeat-babysitting-device that is Moana. He was an animator / writer at Disney before directing, so he knows his stuff. Critics say the animation and "camera-work" is actually good enough to make you expectantly scooch forward on your seat. And that the story is just "adult" enough that actual real-life-adults might enjoy the adventure as much as their kids.

The other big "deception" takes place in the story. It's not one you'll be surprised at after watching the trailer, but I won't bother giving away plot points (as I like to point out, that's what reviews are for). Let's just say it deals with allowing oneself to be wrong and reassess their previously conceived notions. That the movie involves a famed sea monster hunter and child who stows away so she can be one as well, tells you much of what you need to know.

So if you're question this one when you see it pop-up in the ol' queue. Maybe question that question.

Vibe: child's play that adults can enjoy just as well

Out Friday
Watch In Theaters
The Trailer | 1 hr 55 mins | PG | 🍅: 100%

FIRE OF LOVE

Watching nature docs can be awe-inspiring. They're a veritable bounty of insights into our world. But also sometimes *looks over both shoulders to see if David Attenborough is around* a bit samey?? 😬

While I think most of us can agree that Attenborough is an earthly treasure, not unlike the duck-billed platypus (so weird! so cute!), at this point the nonagenarian has narrated more shots of dolphins escaping the ocean in majestic twirls than dolphins have sexually assaulted unsuspecting vacationers. Which is, oddly, a lot.

Cue Fire of Love - another documentary that involves nature, but not another "nature doc." At least not like the others. It does feature incredible footage, specifically of volcanoes. There's also a voice-over done by Miranda July (a director, but not the director here). The big difference lies in the heart of the story. Or rather, hearts. The volcanoes offer the spectacle, but the two people at the center, French volcanologists Katia and Mairuce Krafft, offer the fire.

They were two people who were infatuated with volcanoes, as well as each other. Wait, "were?" Yeah... Unfortunately, they died in 1991 when a volcano they were studying erupted. But that's not the end of the story here, it's actually the beginning, as that film starts from that point and then cycles back through their lives together.

The reviews have been nothing short of spectacular. They laud director Sara Dosa for creating an exciting narrative mostly by using footage shot by the Kraffts themselves - ie no talking heads here. The couple gained much of their funding by creating books and their own documentaries, so there was copious amounts of footage to work with. The movie also sits somewhat in the circle with other recent "omg I would never do that, but I'll totally watch" docs like Free Solo, The Alpinist, but the closest comparison looks to be Grizzly Man.

But instead of coming away perturbed, the critics' takes indicate you'll likely leave a viewing feeling inspired and thoughtful. Which makes sense when we're dealing with the thing that literally shapes our world.

Which is love, of course.

Vibe: footage to die for, literally

Out TODAY
Watch In (Limited) Theaters
The Trailer | 1 hr 33 mins | PG | 🍅: 100%

(called out from top, left to right)

Three movie stars lead a movie - that is absolutely loaded with stars - about an unexplained murder that turns into more. Guess it helps to have David O. Russell directing? 🤷‍♂️

Two clerks who are still very much clerks, and who still very much like to talk, and not much else, in Kevin Smith's Clerks III.

One woman will lead an army of women against invading Europeans. Good thing that woman is Viola Davis.

What's In Theaters +

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