Are you a rule follower?
Then again, it might all depend on who makes the rules.
“There you go, dear. Oh, there you go!
You've got your cream and your sugar now.
Four movies is four times the writing of one movie. Math, I knows it. 👃
But when I spend more time down there, I have a tendency to spend less time up here. And so it goes with this week’s edition. But I’m sure I’ll have something to discuss with you next week. Or maybe you could suggest something? Is there a topic you’re curious about? A movie you had thoughts on?
As always, I’d love to hear from you. 🤗
NEWSY BITS 👾
Netflix reportedly plans first live sports event with celebrities playing golf [Why interesting? Because The Flix has long stated they’re not trying to get into live sports - i.e. bidding on NFL, NBA rights etc. This is obviously much smaller (and not really the same thing), but another test for their growing live events category] - Techcrunch
Golden Globes Are Sold and Hollywood Foreign Press Is No More [this makes sense since The Hollywood Foreign Press, the roughly 100 non-US journalists who were the group behind the Globes, have not had a good few years (to put it lightly!). Was bought by the production company that ran them (Dick Clark Productions) and they’ll be for profit now. No idea if this helps the cause though, since people generally are watching awards shows less and less.] - New York Times
EXTRA CREDIT MOVIE(S) 📝
Asteroid City - the wide release is next week (I’ll give it a full feature then), but it’s having a limited release this weekend (NY / LA) if you’re in the right area code. The reviews are solid, but don’t expect anything more than what you already expect (🤔). Playing in Limited Theaters Friday
Rules are made to be broken, even the rule that says rules are made to be broken.
….?
You’re not wrong, that is incredibly circuitous, but it’s exactly the kind of logic you so often have to bear in what has become it’s own sub-genre, the multiverse movie.
And if there hadn’t been such great entrants recently (see: Everything Everywhere…, the two Spider-Verse movies, Spider-Man: No Way Home) The Flash might’ve held a spot atop the field, if only because it committed an incredible act of fan service - it brought back Michael Keaton as Batman! But whereas No Way Home kept its big character(s) reveal secret until release, Warner Bros. has made Keaton’s return a focus of their marketing campaign. But don’t get it twisted, this is still a movie where The Flash, played by Ezra Miller, is front and center - both of them.
….both??
Hey, rules are made to be broken, remember? 🤷♂️ Like the one about not going back in time to save your parents. But like I also said, even the rule that says rules are made to be broken, probably shouldn’t be broken1. Because after The Flash rescues his parents by going back in time and he then goes forward in time, everything is all screwed up. Oh noez! 😱 So does The Flash go back back in time to un-break the rule he just broke (and Toni Braxton’s heart??)? Ummmm, no.
…..?!?!
Dude, just like, read above, ok? ♾
And while early reactions were incredibly positive for this mayhem in the multiverse (phrases like “best superhero movie ever” were being bandied about), the love started to peter out after more and more critics got a full viewing. It’s still considered one of the better DC superhero movies due to its humor and strong effort by Miller, but that’s not saying a ton, because, well, Batman v Superman and The Justice League exist. But it should be a legitimately good time if you’re into comic book movies.
And if you remember me mentioning it in the past, this allows new DC head James Gunn to create another offshoot universe that’s not tied to all the other recent DC efforts (in other words, buh-bye! Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman, see-ya!! Ben Affleck as Batman, too-da-loo!!! Henry Cavill as Superman).
But if we’ve learned anything (have we learned anything?) it’s that they could always make a comeback. Because, ya know, “rules”…
Out: Thursday
Where: Theaters
2 hrs 24 mins | PG-13 | 🍅: 70%
The trope that if there’s a Black character they’ll die first is so ingrained in horror movie… I guess, lore? that The Blackening (cleverly) aped it for their poster tagline (lazy clickers: “We Can’t All Die First”).
But whereas plenty of Black horror movie characters have been treated poorly, the bigger issue is more often the general lack of them. Which The Blackening aims to rectify, in part, by having a main cast that’s entirely Black. But beyond setting up the cheeky tagline, it allows the movie to dig into, and make fun of, a ton of things related to horror movies, race, stereotypes and “Blackness” - quotes because if you watch the trailer, the dissection of that term looks to be good fodder for the film’s satire. Satire which critics say is both funny and smart, two things not always related. But it makes sense as the movie was made by director Tim Story who helmed Barbershop and co-writer Tracy Oliver, who also scripted Girls Trip. But then it also makes sense that this movie would be more humor than horror.
So while people will die, don’t expect to be too scared - unless people making fun of the lack of diversity on Friends makes you wanna cover your eyes in abject terror.
“The movie is highly entertaining, while being oddly validating and very funny. It cleverly weaves the horror tropes that it rebukes right into the narrative. And it’s done without slipping into parody like the Scary Movie series, where similar notions are skewered more broadly and, with The Blackening now on the table, way less successfully.” - from the AV Club review of The Blackening
Out: Friday
Where: Theaters
1 hr 36 mins | R | 🍅: 81%
Pixar movies are kinda known for their life-changing, life-affirming, tear-duct-emptying (looking at you UP!) qualities. And while I’m sure it’s nice to have created those experiences for viewers, it does mean future entries into the studio’s cannon come laden with expectations sure to slouch even the shoulders of Mr. Incredible. And thus, fair or not, Elemental doesn’t just have to be “good," it has to be “Pixar good” - something generally not ascribed to Pixar’s last effort, Lightyear (though Turning Red definitely nailed it).
So?!
Sooooo it sounds like they might need another try at the ol’ (digital) drawing board (good thing they already have a trailer for their next, Elio). Which isn’t to say the movie is getting entirely bad reviews, just not “Pixar good.”
The movie is a combo of an immigrant story and a love story in a world where the four elements co-exist, but don’t necessarily co-mingle. It all kind of reads like an overview of something you’d expect out of a Pixar movie, which may be in part why reviewers are a bit low on it - it seems to feel expected. If this had come out 10 years ago, would they be reacting the same? Hard to say, but we’re here now and the here and now has to be incorporated.
NOTE: there is an UP! short film pseudo-sequel running before Elemental where Dug the dog helps Carl prepare for his first date since his wife Ellie died. Sadly, Ed Asner, who voiced Carl, passed in 2021 so this will be the last appearance of the character. A number of reviews mention the piece and say that like its forebear, it’s bound to make you weep - i.e. sounds like it’s “Pixar good.” So make sure to cover your popcorn, unless you like a little extra salt. 😭🍿
Out: Friday
Where: Theaters
1 hr 46 mins | PG | 🍅: 77%
In what could easily be considered another recent sub-genre (see above), I present you with, “the plaction movie” - a film where plot is driven by action vs the other way around2.
John Wick is probably the most widely known recent example of what I’m getting at (though it has plenty of older siblings, e.g. The Raid and Atomic Blonde). Because yeah, sure, Wick loses a puppy, but if that’s a plot, I’m pretty sure I’ve read greeting cards that are scripts.
If you know the origins of these types of films, it’ll make a lot more sense. In that the directors are almost always former stunt workers. They’re essentially following the old adage, “write what you know” but morphing it into a sort of “shoot what you know.” Which is why you get a movie like John Wick 4 where the main character doesn’t even say 500 words or the first Extraction movie which had a 12 minute “one shot” action sequence - which clearly wowed audiences enough that they made a sequel.
If you watch the trailer(s) for part deux, you’ll find a similar vibe, a sort of visual antonym to the kinetic quick cut style that dominated the broader action genre for so long (think the Bourne movies).
So if that’s your thing, this is your Friday night.
Out: Friday
Where: Netflix
2 hrs 3 mins | R | 🍅: TBD
I’m going to order the trailers in their levels of weirdness, kicked off by the weirdest looking movie since Beau Is Afraid (and that shit weird).
Poor Things - it looks so weird! So very very weird! And… great?!
They Cloned Tyone - still looks weird, just not as weird as Poor Things. But also, looks fun!
Cobweb - weird ass (murderous?!) parents! One of which is Lizzy Caplan.
Nimona - some fun weirdness to it, if starting to getting less weird. But no less good looking (in fact, early reviews say it’s great).
Shortcomings - it’s about weird people?? Or maybe just people, cuz we’re all weird. And wouldn’t you know it, looks kinda good too (reviews agree). Note: Randall Park’s directorial debut too.
Elio - ummm, the aliens look kinda weird?! Kinda stretching it here… regardless, Pixar’s next.
I’m probably more confused than you are
you could even say action is the plot